Christians are not immune to conflict and controversy and must exhibit spiritual leadership through them.  There will be times of arguments, disagreements, misunderstandings, tensions, personal agendas and selfish desires that a Christian man faces in his daily life.  Jesus is our example on how to lead through these times that are certain to come.  Look at the conflicts He faced because of the actions of those against him:  healing on the Sabbath, money changers in the temple, interaction with the woman at the well, and most of all, the false accusations at the trial before He was crucified.  These are always personal and involve people who may or may not have a godly heart, words and actions.  I want to share four Biblical principles to consider before we speak and lead through conflicts.

LISTEN:  Proverbs 18:13 “He who gives an answer before he hears; It is folly and shame to him.”  We need to learn to carefully listen to fully understand the conflict and motives of the people involved.  We need to always hear both sides of an issue before making decisions.  It is said that there are three solutions to every issue:  yours, mine and what is right.  We must listen and do what is right according to God’s Word and the Holy Spirit.

BE TEACHABLE:  Proverbs 27:17 “Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Are you in the right or wrong?  How can you learn from the conflict?  Either way, how can you respond with humility, grace and love?  This is how we grow in Christ-likeness and show others an example of Christ in our lives. 

THINK:  II Corinthians 10:5 “We are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.” Conflicts are spiritual battles for the Christian and we struggle against an enemy who seeks to divide us and to impair our witness for Jesus.  Don’t let your thoughts (which turn into actions) grow angry, bitter and spiteful.  Move them to be obedient to God’s Word and the Holy Spirit.

MODEL LOVE:  Ephesians 4:15 “Rather, speaking the truth in love.”  Our motive and actions are to model love over winning an argument or conflict.  But, do not shrink from the truth and stand up for what is right through humility, courage and love. 

REMEMBER:  We will never be free from conflicts until Jesus comes or calls us home, so handle them as Jesus would.